Retail Problems - Self Checkout

 With all of those complaints I see on social media about using self-checkout and having to ring your own merchandise, my reply is, you can go to a register with a cashier.  No one is forcing you to use self-checkout (SCO).  And SCO is for 15 items or less, not a cart that is overflowing with merchandise.

Here are a couple of things seen and/or heard at SCO (alcohol edition).

I had to card a woman for her alcohol purchase.  Apparently, it was a non-alcoholic beverage.  I told her that it might contain a small about of alcohol.  The machine flagged it, so I have to se an ID.  She rattles off her birthday.  I reply with, "I have to see the physical ID."  I explain the state and store policy.  After a huge sigh, she digs out her ID.  When she left, I cheerfully said goodbye.  She grumbled something and walked away.

A customer came up to SCO and asked, "Is it going to freak out if I scan alcohol?"

A customer walks up and shows me a bottle of alcohol and asks, "What am I supposed to do with this?"  After a long day of dealing with customers, my answer, "I'll take it!"

Retail Problems - New Skills for my Resume

 More strange interactions with customers that I feel a need to share with everyone.

We have this 80-year-old woman that shops with us weekly.  How do I know her age?  Because she tells me every time I see her.

My first encounter with her, I noticed she was a little crabby.  She told me that's what happens when you get to be eighty years old.  She needed help getting the bags into her car.  I offered my help and asked if someone can help her when she gets home?  She replied that she has no one.  She does not have kids.  Never married and that she is an orphan (sad, I know). 

I think this 80 year old woman took a shine to me because she always comes to me to ring her out or with questions.  One day I tied her shoe for her and got her a shopping cart.  She said she is too old to bend and tie her shoes.  On another visit she asked for a pair of nail clippers.  I told her that we don't have any.  She asked for a pair of scissors.  I hand her the scissors and she tells me that she can't cut her fingernail because it's on her right hand.  So, there I am, cutting her fingernail with a Fiskars scissors.

I am taking nail appointments, let me know if you are interested.

Retail Problems

 The holidays are over.  We barely survived.  

The Christmas music is turned off (Thank God!).

The mad rush of customers finishing their last minute shopping are gone.

Everyone should be happy.  We should be able to relax.

Bring on the holiday returns.

Retail Problems - The Christmas Song Nightmare

 I was told that by playing Christmas music, customers are a lot happier and enjoy their shopping experience.  They are also more likely to spend more money during their shopping visit.  

Meanwhile, us retail employees find ourselves in Dante's Inferno in one of the nine levels of Hell, listening to the same nine Christmas songs over and over for eight hours.

Retail Problems - Bicycle

 I often wonder about the people who ride their bicycle to the grocery store.  They buy a ton of stuff, and they stand at the register trying to figure out how they are going to get all of it home.  They go ahead with the entire purchase and I'm left trying to fit the items in a couple of bags.  If I'm lucky, I get to watch them try to shove them all into a backpack.

Retail Problems - Two Cents

 It was one of those crazy days at work.  I had a long line of customers at the service desk.  As I was helping someone, a customer came up and demanded her change.  "The cashier forgot to give me the change."  I told her that I can't just take it out of any register.  The change has to come from the register that rang up her purchase, otherwise both register drawers will be off when counted.  

I brought the customer over to the register and realize that it's a new cashier.  She has no idea how to open her drawer and get change and she is in the middle of ringing up a large order.  So, I start bagging for her and explain the situation to the customer.  The customer, of course, becomes upset because she does not want to wait.  I try to calm her down.  The transaction ends and I instruct the cashier on how to do a "no sale."  She's new, so I want to teach her how to do this so we don't get in the same situation in the future.  

The cashier opens the drawer and pulls out the change.  Two cents.  Yes, you read that correctly.  The customer threw a fit because she needed her two cents back.

I try to carry change in my pocket (my own money) so I don't have to go through these nightmares.  Unfortunately, this was one of the times I did not have any money on me.

Retail Problems

 I think I have been hanging out at work too much (is that possible?). 

I had a customer ask me if I have a twin sister.  Of course I replied, yes.  Just kidding.  I replied, no.  The customer continues, "I swear I saw your doppelganger at (some bar) over the weekend." (of course, this was said to me in front of my manager).  Apparently, I have a twin sister who spends all of my money by partying all weekend at local bars. 

 I assured the customer that it wasn't me at the bar.  I also made sure my boss knows I'm not living it up at the bar when I am not at work (it does sound like fun, though).

Retail Problems

 Time for another installment of retail problems.  This is where you get to read about the weirdos people who step out into the world and try to interact normally with other humans.

I have been working Customer Service lately, handling returns for both our store and Amazon.  There is a noticeable difference between the customers returning merchandise to our store and those just returning to Amazon.  Our store customers are (usually) a lot nicer to us employees.  Of course, there are always the scary strange odd situations that occur on a daily basis.  

We have a guy who makes store returns.  He likes to return old produce purchased from another store.  I'm not sure why he doesn't return to where he purchased the food.  I'm afraid to ask.  He has receipts for his purchases.  The receipts can be up to 3 months old.  I don't think produce can last three months long.  His produce is hot, old, squishy and smelly (that's the only way I can describe it...nicely).  I guess I could give you my honest reaction and say I'm trying to keep myself from getting sick while doing the return.  His reason for his returns?  "My wife didn't like it."  I wouldn't like three-month-old lettuce, either.  Nor would I like mushy, moldy cucumbers.  I'm sick just writing about it.

Moving on...

We have another woman who is a frequent "returner."  She likes to bring in items that have been opened.  For example, a half-eaten steak, a half-eaten bag of chips, half bag of pistachios, part of a chocolate bar.  She has receipts for these items.  They are, of course, purchased at another location.  Apparently, that location has flagged her and will not let her return anything to that store.  Her reason for returning these items?  "My husband didn't like it."  I have yet to meet this "husband."  Does he like anything she buys?  Does she even have a husband?  Is this just her entertainment or social interaction?  If she does have a husband, maybe he should do the grocery shopping!  There will probably be a lot less returns.  

And one more before I go....

I had a woman who wanted a refund on two beers that she did not drink.  She purchased them a couple weeks ago from a different store.  Who returns beer?  Does everyone go through their pantry and return items they haven't consumed?  Is this normal behavior?

All I know is, you can't make this stuff up.

Retail Problems

 Another day, another customer story.

Normally I post about the weird scary crazy customers that I encounter at work.  Today I thought I would do something a little different.

A customer came in to do some Amazon returns (that alone can be a whole discussion).  He had his wife's phone because she was in the hospital.  He had no idea how to work the phone or how to do the returns.  He's probably in his late 70's and has no idea how to work an Iphone.  I stepped in and took over the phone and went through all of the steps for the returns for each item.  As I'm finishing up, he tells me he is very grateful for my help with the phone and the returns.  He goes on to tell me that his wife is in the hospital and that he almost lost her.  I told him that it was no problem, that I was happy to help and wished his wife a speedy recovery.

Moral of the story:  Not all customer encounters are scary.

Retail Problems

 I keep thinking that I am going to run out of stories and then I go to work.

This day I was working as a cashier.  It was crazy.  Long lines.  No bagger to help me.  I had this one customer come through my line.  I rang up her stuff and bagged the items.  I even walked around and put them in her cart.  The customer leaves.  I continue with my line for the next twenty minutes.  All of a sudden, she comes up to my register (the opposite way, not as a customer) and starts accusing me of stealing her groceries.  I must have had a look of shock on my face.  The woman went a little crazy, telling me that I stole all of her groceries.  When I realized that she was serious, I said, "I don't have your groceries.  I bagged them and put them into your cart.  There's nothing at my register and nothing in my apron.  I wouldn't steal someone's groceries."  She huffed and went back into the store to shop.

I made sure I let the store manager know what happened, in case they have to check the security tapes.

In case you are wondering, this is a regular customer.  You might remember my story about her showing me her phone as her ID card.  She now makes sure to come to my line when I am ringing (oh, lucky me).  The other cashiers call her my friend.

Retail Problems - How I accidentally got high at work

 Time for a quick retail problems post.

I was working at the customer service desk when a customer came in for a catering order.  I could tell that she was pretty happy to be there by the way she greeted me.  She was surrounded by a scent cloud (I think she smoked something prior to entering the store).  I grabbed the catering order form, bumped into my manager and said, "If I'm drug tested right now, I might not pass."  When the manager got to the desk, she was overwhelmed by the scent and told me to find some spray to hide the odor.  This resulted in me giving the area a deep clean so our customers don't think we are getting high on the job.

I guess if you have to go shopping, why not be extra happy about it?

Retail Problems

 I figured we needed our monthly dose of scary people retail problems.  

I think my stories are dwindling.  I'm either not shocked or surprised anymore by what people say or do in the wild or I'm just used to the craziness.

I've mentioned that I work in a grocery store and that I have to card people for alcohol purchases.  I have to card everyone and see the physical ID card.  One busy day, I was ringing a customer's order and when I asked for an ID card, she showed me her phone.  She had a photo of her driver's license.  I explained that I had to see the actual Driver's License.  And that's how it started.  A fifteen minute rant about how the world is going digital and that our store needs to catch up to the times.  Everyone everywhere is accepting photo IDs.  While she is ranting, I'm feeling sorry for my really long line of customers.  I explain that our store isn't there yet and that this is a rule.  Of course, she wants to speak to my manager.  I did one better and asked the store manager, who was ringing right behind me.  The customer and store manager went back and forth for a few minutes.  The manager said she can not approve the purchase.  Now that another 5 minutes have gone by, the customer says, "Okay," and pulls her driver's license out of her purse.  When she left, every customer, when it was their turn, said, "I can't believe she argued with you for 15 minutes and had her ID on her the entire time!"

Yea, you can't make this stuff up.

Retail Problems

 I've learned a lot about humans and their behavior in the wild by working retail.  And, working in a grocery store, you come in contact with all sorts of people.

When I first started this job, I noticed how people interact with me.  I got a lot of people who would grunt when I asked them questions.  Some people won't talk to me at all.  And, of course, there are those that talk during the entire transaction.  Some people are angry shoppers.  While others are just plain crabby (maybe they are hungry?).

We have regulars that shop weekly.  And we have "regulars" that shop every single day.  Not sure why they don't just stock up a little.  Maybe we are their daily entertainment.

I do know that most of our customers are friendly.

We do have "those" customers.  Customer:  "I don't want to give Jeff Bezos any more money."  Yet, here you are shopping......

Another favorite customer is the guy who pays his order with all singles.  He says, "It's my stripper money!"   I think he is a hairstylist, but I like stripper money better.

And, finally, I had a customer in my line tell the customer I was waiting on that she left her packaged meat on the shelf.  She said, "It isn't mine."  When it was his turn, he said that he saw her place it there.  Then he said, "I bet you see a lot of weird stuff."  

Yes I do......Yes I do.

Retail Problems - Self Checkout

 I thought I would dedicate a post to self-checkout.  It's called self-checkout (SCO) for a reason.  You scan the items out yourself.  The employee standing there is for any problems or questions that arise.  Not to scan your entire order.  Oh, and it's fifteen items or less, by the way.  I'm surprised at the number of people who can't read the sign.  It is definitely not two carts full of merchandise.

OK, now that we have cleared all of that up, let's get started.

Customer:  "Why is there only one cashier?"

Me:  Because we don't have enough cashiers.

Customer:  Well, if I wanted to scan stuff, I would go to Wal-Mart.

The SCO machine accepts credit or debit cards only.  The customer came up and asked me to read it to them.  She replied, "Oh.  I guess its a good thing I went to the eye doctor this morning."

There are customers that are on their phone.  They can't scan and talk at the same time.  They end up causing the line to back up.  You are either on the phone or you are scanning.  Not both.

Some customers decide they want a job.  "They should give me a discount for scanning my own stuff."  Umm, who decided to use the SCO machine?

I get some crazy questions like, "Can we check out here with food?"  I work in a grocery store, so, yea, that's what you scan here.

There's the customer who told me, "I don't want this because it's too wet."  And she handed me a red cabbage.  In case you are wondering, it wasn't wet.

There are customers who approach SCO and throw all of their stuff on the floor.  I guess they can't see the shelf attached to the machine.

And of course, the customers who approach the machine and say, "I'm not good at this."  

Oh, and I can't forget the woman who said to me, "Sister, I need help over here."

My personal favorite was the customer leaving SCO, mumbling to herself.  She walks toward the restrooms and enters the men's restroom.  Fifteen seconds passed, she came out mumbling and entered the women's restroom. 

Retail Problems

 I could probably dedicate an entire blog to retail problems.  I hope you are amused by these retail stories.   I know I certainly get a kick out of my customer interactions.

A guy came to my register.  When I gave him the total, he pulled out a plastic bag wallet (probably a follower of RT).  I asked him about it and his reply, "It's where I'm at in life."  

I rang up some items and the customer pointed at some items and said, "I don't need those."  I wasn't sure if that was a confession?  I don't need those, but I'm buying them anyway.  After stating this several times, she finally said, "I don't have enough money for those items."  (Thanks for the clarification)

Then there are the customers that know how to run the store.  A customer approached me and said, "You need to open more registers."  I replied, "We need to hire more people.  We have jobs posted.  It seems no one wants to work these days."

OK, and one of my favorite quotes from a customer at closing time, "They always lock the door at night?"

Retail Problems

Do not go to self-checkout if you have no idea what you are doing and expect the attendant to ring everything up for you.  That is not why we are here.  You're a big boy/girl, ring the merchandise up by yourself or take your things over to a register with a cashier.

Thank you.

Retail Problems

 I mentioned a few posts ago that I have a new job.  I am currently working as a cashier at a grocery store.  Yes, I strongly believe in self inflicting pain upon myself.   I had to get certified so I can do liquor sales (I got a certificate and everything!).  Apparently, my age has no meaning when it comes to selling liquor.  I have been writing down some of my favorite exchanges with customers with the hopes of sharing them with all of you.  They are quite entertaining. 

I guess I'll just jump in and start off with some alcohol stories.

There are many alcohol encounters.  You see, we have to card everyone.  Yes, you have gray hair and wrinkles, but I still have to card you.  When I card someone who is obviously over 21 they feel the need to tell me their age and that I am crazy for asking them.  I reply that I am just doing my job.  Other responses when I ask:  

"Carded?  That's just ridiculous! I'm 70 years old!"  

"Do you see my gray hair?"  

"Do I look under 21?"  

"I have gray hair, am in my 40's and run my own business!"

All to which I would like to reply, "I didn't ask for your age, your occupation or about your gray hair, I asked to see a photo ID."

Oh, and I have to see the actual ID (Driver's License, State ID).  Apparently, before I started, an employee was fired for not looking at an ID (the police were involved, etc.).  I'm not sure if that is true, and I really don't want to find out.  I guess sometimes I'm a rule follower.  

One more funny encounter before I go.  I was standing at self-checkout and a woman walks up and asks, "Can you do the alcohol or are you too young?"  I replied, "I know I don't look a day over 20, but, yes, I can ring the alcohol for you."